What we say vs what we do..

[Overtaxed]

OK, first off, this isn't directly a COVID thread, it's just an observation of human behavior that relates to COVID (and RVs a little bit) that I thought might spark some interesting discussion. If this is too OT or against regs, please delete mods and accept my apologies.

So, I was reading an article today about the death of movie theaters and it got me thinking, lots of people say "I love to go to the movies" and yet, very few people actually do it, especially not today because of the obvious risk. What people actually seem to "love" based on money/time spent is sitting on their couch and watching a movie or TV show. But it seems most claim the opposite, I "love" seeing sports live, but, even if they have plenty of money, time and locality to the stadium; watch the vast majority of it on TV.

Now, let me extend this a bit because this is really the crux of my wonder here. Lots of people (not me) say they "love" the hustle/bustle of the city. Or "love" being in big groups of people. But, let's examine that for a moment, and look at people's actual behavior. What is one of the first things that people buy when they hit it big? A car perhaps? A bigger house/condo? Maybe an RV even? All these things; serve exactly the opposite purpose, a car isolates you from public trans, a bigger house isolates you from your neighbors and an RV isolates you from hotels and people while traveling. I used to fly a lot for work, and thankfully, I had enough disposable income that I could afford an airline club membership. I often thought to myself, why am I paying for this. I don't drink (they have free booze), it's expensive (500 or so per year), and the food is basically chips and cookies (unless you spend a few days a week in there, you'll never eat 500 bucks worth, let's put it that way). So, why did I pay for it? The answer is basically to self-isolate. To get me away from the crowds in the airport to a much smaller group of people, less noise, more privacy. Now, take that a step further, hit it really, really big, what do people buy then? They buy their own planes, so they don't need to be around anyone at all, no club membership required, flying in complete isolation (which, if I'm honest, sounds wonderful!).

I could give example after example, but, I think I've made my point clear; if we "love being around others" why is it that one of the first/most common things to buy when we have money is to NOT be around others? Are we all delusional? Do we say we want one thing because it's expected but actually want something else? I'm asking these questions in good faith, not because I know the answers, because I'm curious, especially the more extroverted members, do you operate differently? I'm highly introverted, so I'd be the first to tell you, I hate being in groups of people, I pay for the club to get away from others, I drive a car so I don't have to sit next to people I don't know/talk to them, and I live on a ton of land so I don't have to deal with my neighbors dropping by. I watch movies at home because I prefer to see them alone, not because the 15 dollar ticket is in anyway an impediment. In fact, if I could see a first run movie for 100 bucks in the theater with just me and my friends, I'd probably go again. Except, I'm not the first to have that idea, rich people do that all the time, either build their own theaters or pay for a private screening.

It seems like actions and stated desires really don't match when you look at the behavior and economics.

[Walaby]

I think the items you identify (purchase car, bigger house, etc), are not necessarily purchased in order to improve self-isolation.

Purchasing a new car - more bells and whistles, nicer comforts etc..We all need cars. If we can afford the best, why not?

House: Again - comfort not necessarily self-isolation.

I don't see those purchases as counter to either self-isolation or desire for social interaction. Im not an extrovert, but not an introvert either. So, somewhat in the middle.

I enjoy new cars. Just bought my wife a new 2020 Acura RDX. I have a 2017 Ram 3500. Also like collecting and working on old cars. Have a 63 Nova.

I enjoy nice houses. Current house is 2100SQ FT. it's too small sometimes now that Grand Kids live with me. And is too small for twice a year holiday gatherings But, other than that, it's fine. If I bought a new one, maybe slightly larger, I dunno.

I think just because similar people buy similar things, they can easily be for different reasons. And even if one is an extrovert, they still need cars, houses etc.. Doesn't mean they are buying it because secretly they are an introvert, or desire less interaction. Think it just is was it is.

I enjoy the movie theater. We went out generally twice a month with close friends. I miss that.

I prefer to watch sporting events with just my wife. When we do attend Super Bowl party, I find myself not enjoying the game as much. Im a really big football fan, so I really become a couch potato during the season.

Just my thoughts.. not sure if I missed the point of your post or not.

Mike

[Overtaxed]

Interesting response. I think we're coming at it a little differently, let me explain a bit.

Your car example resonates with me, I also like new cars; but I was thinking more in a city life landscape where a car isn't required at all. So, in that type of environment, a car can actually be an impediment, and it's really expensive, unlike in a suburb/rural area where it's a fact of life. You look at the poor in NYC, they all ride public trans. Middle class, some public trans, some taxis/uber. Wealthy, likely no public trans, maybe taxi/Uber or a private car service. Wildly rich, helicopter. Each one provides more and more social isolation, and, until you get to a helicopter, doesn't provide (in NYC anyway) much in the way of speed. It just gets you away from other people into a private space.

Same thing with housing. The poor live primarily in multi-family units, likely with a lot of people living under one roof, often multiple generations. Middle class, probably an apt/condo in a decent part of town. Wealthy/rich, a building with a doorman and a private elevator. Each level, buying more and more social isolation. Yes, they are also buying sq/ft, but, funny thing is, as you move up that list, you're probably dealing with less and less people in the house while, at the same time, increasing sq/ft. So the poor live 8 people in 1000 sq/ft, middle class maybe 4 people in 1500 sq/ft, rich, you might have 1-2 people in 6000 sq/ft.

Now, to your other point, yes, I agree, people buy different things for different reasons. So while some rich guy bought the entire floor because he wants his personal space, another rich woman buys the entire floor because she's in love with houses. But my point is really this, not so much the reasons behind it, but the trend. Is there an example of people who are wealthy deciding that they want "more people/density" in their personal space? I'm sure there are, but I'm struggling to think of one.

[jkwilson]

Being able to choose when you are among the crowds or in isolation is the luxury of a private home or RV.

We live in a very rural area with plenty of land to stay away from people for weeks at a time. Our kids live in Boston, and we love visiting there and experiencing the city. We are 5 hours from Chicago and love getaways to there and exploring the city.

But we have the luxury of retreating to our farm or to a campsite in a pretty location when the hustle and bustle begins to wear on us.

[ckreef]

Me and Mrs skreef were never people to go out to where there were big gatherings. I don't really like going out to the movies, rarely went to parties. When the shelter in place order came we really didn't miss anything. Everyone in the news keeps complaining about isolation and spending all that extra time with their spouse. Stay at home didn't bother us at all.

Took the TT out camping this past holiday weekend. Basically entertained ourselves.

[SGT ROC]

I'm kind of a social animal to an extent, DW - not as much. We live in a pretty rural area, which suits us both, although she would like closer shopping venues (don't know why - she hates shopping). We used to travel quite a bit, mainly the Caribbean, but now neither of us wants to go outside the country. We travelled with "our" group of friends - most of whom we still camp with, party occasionally (rarely any more), and ride ATV's. We just finished a camping trip with the grand kids which went great. There were friends there too, and we spent almost no time talking about "thing".

[Houndbb]

I'm kind of a social animal to an extent, DW - not as much. We live in a pretty rural area, which suits us both, although she would like closer shopping venues (don't know why - she hates shopping). We used to travel quite a bit, mainly the Caribbean, but now neither of us wants to go outside the country. We travelled with "our" group of friends - most of whom we still camp with, party occasionally (rarely any more), and ride ATV's. We just finished a camping trip with the grand kids which went great. There were friends there too, and we spent almost no time talking about "thing".

I get the irony of the “wanting to be close to shopping” yet hating the task. While I, too, hate shopping (Bruce hates it more-NO tolerance for rude people armed with a cart) inevitably you need food, clothing, paint/stain, etc. You just want to get there, get what you need and get home again especially if you’re in the middle of some project. A longer drive only adds to the frustration.
N

[SGT ROC]

I get the irony of the “wanting to be close to shopping” yet hating the task. While I, too, hate shopping (Bruce hates it more-NO tolerance for rude people armed with a cart) inevitably you need food, clothing, paint/stain, etc. You just want to get there, get what you need and get home again especially if you’re in the middle of some project. A longer drive only adds to the frustration.
N

I get yelled at (well, talked to sternly) all of the time by Vicki because I to am intolerant of rude people in the stores. Crowding in from of you, completely blocking isles, cutting you off. They are even more rude when wearing these masks! Even the store workers!

[Wicked ace]

I'm not a social butterfly and generally avoid crowds. Instead of downsizing I "upgraded" to larger house and property before I retired. I guess I fit most of the profiles but some things are important to me. Especially this time of year I miss "Cars & Coffee" on Saturday mornings, Weekend car shows and gatherings, I hate virtual racing as they just did for IMSA at Virginia International Raceway. I'm not a Nascar fan any more these days but seeing the stands empty at Darlington Raceway was a strange sight, one where I have to question the reasons why. When I travel I look for local car shows and racing events in the campground vicinity. I can usually spot places where people will go to show off their cars.
A couple Ice Cream / hot dog / burger huts in the area tried opening with voluntary mask and distancing rules per the state guidelines, with signs posted, but there are always the ones who can't or won't get it. They didn't want to be the "Covid" police and I don't blame them, so they chose not to be open rather than put their employees or people at risk.
I also miss the farmers and flea markets for all the same reasons.
I get upset sometimes myself when out walking. For a long time I have had a regimen of 10k steps a day so I walk with my dog about 4-1/2 miles. This last weekend was tough with more people out in the parks and trails. I had words with one guy without a mask walking down the trail like he owned it, obviously not respecting or caring about others.
Through it all, I would rather stay healthy and alive. So like so many other things, because there is no cohesive message as such from leadership, the onus is on me to protect myself from the ignorant and oblivious.

[[email protected]]

I get upset sometimes myself when out walking. For a long time I have had a regimen of 10k steps a day so I walk with my dog about 4-1/2 miles. This last weekend was tough with more people out in the parks and trails. I had words with one guy without a mask walking down the trail like he owned it, obviously not respecting or caring about others.

How long does the virus live outdoors, in sunlight, in our current temperatures? I would not be worried AT ALL outdoors in a situation like that. If you are, you might want to spend more time at home.